Why is it that I'm still looking for reasons, or rather excuses as a matter of fact to cover up for everything? Why do I never fail to give the benefit of the doubt? Actually that's not very true. As much as it is a way to comfort myself, or to cushion myself from any hurt that I feel from the fall, I'm quite aware of whatever that's going on. When some things are not meant to be, there's no point in forcing your way through, we all know that. Time would tell. People would wake up. I'm definitely not in denial, definitely not as vulnerable as thought to be.
Pretty much sounding like I'm trying to comfort myself uh. How untrue is this. I'm definitely not a pessimist, but there's no harm in preparing for the worst to come right? Why do I find it so pointless to be ranting so much srsly. I actually feel really comfortable ranting in this space because no one really reads this. Feels like I'm just thinking out loud and am thankful I've actually got a personal space to get let my thoughts flow. Could pretty much just pen down my thoughts in black and white, but I figured it's wiser to let my fingers flow.
I'm getting increasingly incoherent and my thoughts are hindered by my limited vocabulary. I can't seem to form my thoughts properly, let alone express them in words comprehensibly. So I guess that's it for now?
Oh ya, before I forget... Debs texted me at an unearthly hour of 4am-ish earlier this morning. And there was this question she pose to me that got me really stumped. I figure I've been rather messed up, am I? How did I get myself this confused also, I've got no idea. One thing I know for sure is that I'm aware of what I don't want and what I wouldn't compromise. As for the rest... I'd say let's just leave it as that for now. That's about it. Don't wish to go further into details kthxbye!
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